Recently my good friend’s Paul and Esta popped their first sprog (well, Esta did most of the work I’m told) - And in traditional fashion I brought them a gift to celebrate.
It’s called ‘Smoking Baby’ and I’m sure if you want you can get one from somewhere on the net, but I got mine in Brighton. As you may imagine, I was chuffed to bits to meet little Amelie - she’s gorgeous and despite myself I think I actually said "Awwww". I quickly had to talk about football to regain some equilibrium (not that I like football - it was just the first manly thing that came to mind).
But seriously, she is amazing - even if she is making Katie broodier than ever. I was not so pleased to be asked to take back my gift though! I mean, come on, what self-respecting parent wouldn’t want Baby smokes-a-lot around to teach their kid at an early age that smoking is not only sociably acceptable, but also makes you look cool. I’m surprised this little guy hasn’t got a pair of gnarly shades or far out tattered jeans - Just look how cool he looks puffing away on that big tab.
Well done proud parents - I bet you can’t wait to see what I get her for Christmas!